If I Needed Someone

I just recently got out of a multi-year relationship.  The end was sudden, but for people who know me, not really unexpected.  What has been most interesting has been reconnecting with people who I had fallen out of touch with for years.

One of the biggest victims of my relationship was with one of my three best friends.  I have known this person for 15 years and he and I have gone through hell and high water together.  He dislocated his shoulder jumping from my car while it was in motion, I was best man at his wedding, we have laughed and cried together.  We committed numerous crimes and misdemeanors together.  When I was telling him about the demise of my relationship, he went on to tell me about the demise of his marriage.  It had only been three years that they had been married.

These were two people who had been through so much together.  They started dating in college when they met one another in the apartment complex's pool.  There had been dates, fights, the death of a parent, so many numerous beginnings and endings which only seemed to strengthen their relationship.  Now it seems like their epic has come to its conclusion.

Through Facebook I looked through my friends and saw a lady friend from college who I had not spoken with in some years.  Through her I found out that she had a 4 year old son and had been divorced for approximately a year.  She opined that getting married is a huge mistake for anyone and that she would never do it again.  She says that is a condition of any relationship that she enters now.  She will only allow so much of herself to be available to a significant other and keep the rest for herself.  This system has given her her desired amount of freedom and happiness.

When looking at the multitude of people I know who have just gotten out of serious relationships, the most common thing that I'm seeing is people shutting themselves off from dating or any other sort of entanglements.  For many of these individuals, this period of romantic isolation can be measured in many months if not years.  The question I have is, what will be my next move?